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DaniWestRN

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Registered: 12/08/05
Posts: 3,730
 #1 
Interesting article in the Nov addition of Foreign Policy.

"The Lie We Love"
http://www.icasn.org/news/oct08/The%20Lie%20We%20Love.pdf

http://www.foreignpolicy.com/story/cms.php?story_id=4508&print=1

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Danielle

Http://www.WesthavenKids.com
Joan

Registered: 12/06/05
Posts: 3,023
 #2 
It sucks, doesn't it? But it's good that the word is getting out. Thanks for posting this, Dani.
Carol

Registered: 10/12/06
Posts: 295
 #3 
Thanks for posting Dani.

carol, mom to 4 lovely girls, 2 from ET home 11/07 via AAI WA State
MomofETchild

Registered: 12/27/07
Posts: 397
 #4 
ouch
DianeL

Registered: 02/09/08
Posts: 511
 #5 
Many emotions to go with this article.
We were so worried about IA for these reasons;
We're hoping our agency is doing all it can to ensure ethical adoptions are taking place, but even then, there is no guarantee.
Thoughts on what's going on right now in ET?

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Diane
C (dh)

Waiting 7.22.08.
I171H approval 10.01.08
Referral for daughter(5.5) and son (3.5) 12/2008
court date 3/13---passed!
BC and travel date: march 26
Going to ET 4/8
HOME!!! 4/17
kehrman5

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Registered: 03/27/07
Posts: 619
 #6 
Wow, ouch, and hmmmmmmmmm? Thanks for posting!
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Kimberley
Fort Wayne, IN
Wife to Torrey
Mom of Noah (bio-9), Carter (bio-6), Keziah Wubitu (ET-4), Marjorie Sefan (ET-4ish)
Wubi's adoption CHSFS 5/17/07 Dossier 9/6/07 Referral 12/6/07 Travel
Sefan's adoption
8/4/08 Dossier to CHSFS, 11/23/08 Changed to BFAS, 1/27/09 Referral,4/6/09 Medicals
5/27/09 Court 6/18/09 Embassy date.....stuck in ET...uggg..new embassy 6/25/09
http://ehrmanadoptionjourney.blogspot.com
nogreaterjoy

Registered: 07/04/08
Posts: 643
 #7 
Powerful article. Thanks for sharing it.
I agree, that most orphans are older children and children who are sick or disabled. It's sad that more families arent on "waiting lists" to bring these children into their families.
The more I learn, the more I realized how "in the dark" I was when I first started the adoption journey.
So much to think about .

__________________
Cindy
DH - Roger
DS - Luke (bio, 15)
DD - Meron (15 yrs old, Ethiopia, adoption final 10/1/09)
DS - Alex (bio, 12)
DD- Emily (bio, 11)
DS - Abiye (4 1/2 yrs old, Ethiopia, home 12/13/08)
DD -Lily ( 3 yrs old, Ethiopia, home 7/29/06)
tpaschke

Registered: 12/30/05
Posts: 534
 #8 
I think transparency is helpful--it's a blessing to be able to meet our children's birth parents, to see video of their first homes, and have detailed accounts of the story that brought them to care. Yes, corruption is still possible, but it can be limited.

I do have to take issue with the issue of "real orphans" At least in ET, there are many reasons families with or both living birth parents can't raise them in ET. It seems a bit off to think that children who have a living birth parent shouldn't be placed--who are we (or the author of the article) to judge a difficult decision made by birth families? That said, I am glad to hear about steps taken by various organizations to increase transparency and reduce child abuse world wide.

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Tracy
Wife to DH Jeff

Mom to:

Shahra (born 9/11/05,
Welcomed home 12/17/2005

Samuel (born 5/26/08 home 10/10/08)
pjupdates.blogspot.com
Joan

Registered: 12/06/05
Posts: 3,023
 #9 
Many articles like this mention Ethiopia, but no one ever investigates. How long before we see the first real report from here?
DaniWestRN

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Registered: 12/08/05
Posts: 3,730
 #10 
"Thoughts on what's going on right now in ET?"

Did you happen to read in relation to the JCICS letter what JCICS was doing in ET over the summer?
From their website:
"During nine meetings with the Ministry of Justice, Ministry of Women’s Affairs, Ministry of Foreign Affairs and First Instance Court, common concerns related to “legalized child trafficking”, cultural insensitivity, regulatory capacity and poor practice were expressed."

There are issues with ET adoption. Not with every adoption certainly, but don't think ET is free of issues. And I have to go with Cindy, "The more I learn, the more I realized how "in the dark" I was when I first started the adoption journey." And I have learned a few new things this week.

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Danielle

Http://www.WesthavenKids.com
DianeL

Registered: 02/09/08
Posts: 511
 #11 
Thanks, Dani, I'll check out the link.
So what does the individual AP do?
We don't want our decisions to help the unethical practices continue, and it seems that putting money in any form or filter(that is, through a good agency) still motivates the more harmful aspects to continue.

Joan,
Yes, it would be good to see a comprehensive report on ET in general.

Also: does anyone know about why ET is not a hague country? Does it plan to become one any time soon?
And, is there any data that the hague convention is making real progress in ending unethical practices?


__________________
Diane
C (dh)

Waiting 7.22.08.
I171H approval 10.01.08
Referral for daughter(5.5) and son (3.5) 12/2008
court date 3/13---passed!
BC and travel date: march 26
Going to ET 4/8
HOME!!! 4/17
cndmom

Registered: 06/15/08
Posts: 375
 #12 
This raises one big question for me. How can we be sure that our adoptions are ethical? Unless we know the birth family's language, how can we be sure what they are saying?

One reason I've heard for agencies not allowing direct contact between birth family and adoptive families is to stop the birth family from pressuring the adoptive family for money. So when we use agency employee's for translation, how do we know what the family is saying about their reasons or expectation of the adoption. How do we know anything for sure? Someone on this board posted a while ago that after their translator relayed the birth families request for money, that translator was fired (not sure what agency they were with). This was before the the US law came into effect of course. How transparent is a process that the agency that places the child also provides all the translation between the families?


cndmom
erinmorrey

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Registered: 08/22/07
Posts: 393
 #13 
Count me among those who feel like they were completely in the dark about adoption, despite all the reading and preparation and knowledge that we took into Melkamu's adoption. And yet, I feel like I learn more all the time--and most of what I learn worries me.
__________________
Erin
Married to Jason
Patrick, 5 1/2, bio
Melkamu, 2 1/2, home forever 3/7/08
http://www.adoptionfamily.blogspot.com
Dreamofpeace

Registered: 04/06/07
Posts: 256
 #14 
I have also wondered about ethics. We chose CHSFS for that reason because they've been around forever.

However, I've wondered what's up with the school photos. From what I recall we are to bring a photo of the school the child will be attending along with yearly reports with the school? Are the birth parents under the impression that they are sending their child overseas for nothing more than to get a good education and return back?

For those that have been in birth family meetings-did you feel like all of your translation was conveyed properly? I'm assuming they don't allow any recording devices in the meeting room?

__________________
Mom to:
DS-12
DS-11
DS-2
Waiting for our new addition as of 5/22/08
Referral for 3 month old baby girl on 9/28/09!!
cndmom

Registered: 06/15/08
Posts: 375
 #15 
Not being able to record a meeting also raises questions in my mind about what is really being said at a meeting. Why would you not be allowed to record it? What possible harm could there be from doing that? It's not just US agencies either that try to control contact between the families. Really makes me wonder what is going on in all Ethiopian adoptions, my country as well.

edit to add: I've heard of more than one case of birth family believing that the child was going to get an education and then come home.
cndmom
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